Thursday, July 6, 2017

Growing where God places you to be, at any given moment

The training I'm receiving from my job is priceless! 

Not so much intellectually, as it is learning how to organize programs, projects, events, or anything to the "T"; the handling of mulitiple portfolios simultaneously without dropping the ball on any aspect - nor complaining about the load of work - rather, simply delivering results; yet in all that, I think the area I grew the most is how to deal with the diversity and multiplicity of human relations and emotions: people's temparaments, abilities, capacities, susceptibilities, backgrounds, hidden agendas and energies in general, while staying poised and "trying" to preserve your internal peace, joy, and truth. 

I have grown. I have mostly been forged in situations I found uncomfortable, in instances when I missed seeing shortfalls in my planning (blind spot), in episodes when I felt used (and/or betrayed), and when interacting with partners who had a completely different work ethics than the culture of my company. I have questionned myself, my motives, my approach, my purpose. But I've grown. 

I understood, even more, that through any circumstance, conflict episode, shortfalls there is always something to learn. Yes, as we say in Harambe-Cameroon every problem is indeed an opportunity, to learn, grow, create, know, build. I learned to identify fight-or-flight dynamics and try to move above it. Every time, I must remind myself that there is something God is saying to me, to mold me to be a better person, more understanding, more aware of other's feelings, more disciplined, less selfish, less judgmental. It is usually tough to do that in the midst of the heat, but slowly afterwards, God speaks to us, if we care to listen we hear what He whispers during those pauses. 

And you know, even though I learned early on in my teenage years to adopt a growth mindset (vs a fixed mindset -as illustrated in the photo below), in times of heat and disruption, what keeps me anchored are the Christian principles I have interiorized. 

What would I do without my God? What would I be without the gospel message I find in Gospel music? How would I cope without Jesus' guidelines? What would I be without God's Holy Spirit hold in me? Honestly, without God I would be a reckless, purposeless, energy-less and energy-sucker cranky woman in people's lives, everyday. 

But I choose to hold firm on my anchor, my refuge and my strength : Yahweh! 

Bit by bit, I understand more why God placed me in a specific place for a specific chapter of my life. The story is still unfolding...the learning and growing is still happening. God is Good. To Him my heart and spirit give all the glory!
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