#5 - Douala, Motorbiking, Love, strength of Character

KMER 09 – THOUGHTS, REFLECTIONS AND EXPERIENCES #5- Week 8,9 (August 30th – September 7th)

· This is wonderful; they are showing a DVD on the History of Cameroon in the bus ride to Douala. What better way to disseminate this lost history. A history of a country that has been shoved under the carpet of history. I’m so glad to see this kind of action. It really shows things are changing. As our magnificent Madiba once said, the arc of History is bending towards justice. Truth can never be erased.

· In the midst of all my emails, I received the sweetest, succinct yet profound message from Salmahboo. She’s a breadth of sunshine!!!

· In banks, especially in Cameroon, you see the funniest scenarios. When it comes to money-handling, people don’t joke. So I go to this micro-finance Agency, where my cousin is a teller, just to visit his office space etc. As I’m waiting for him, in front of his consultant desk, a woman walks in the bank, she comes and sit on the empty seat next to me, and asks permission to use his table to count her money. He agrees. The woman is dressed with a long blue jeans skirt , an orange sleeveless shirt, nice cute golden sandals, with a Burberry headscarf on her head, and she’s carrying a big-sized black shiny bag. Ok, she may have mismatched the styles of her cloths, but she looked presentable. So, after 5 minutes she takes out her money in her bag and start counting it on the table. As soon as she finishes counting that money, she gets up infront of the chair, opens up her jean s skirt, and reveals a red knee-high short (You know like those soccer player short s!). lol. (I’m like, uhhmmmm…) from the left pocket she takes out another package of money. With no stress man. From She closes her shorts pocket, puts down her jeans skirt, and closes her secret entry. Seats down, and start counting her money again. Lol. You can imagine the scene. My emotions went from being confused, to wanting to roll on the floor laughing out loud. Rotflol.

· Douala is great, 2 days in this city, and I feel rested. Just the break I needed. My family is exceptional, friends are great, and partners are cooperative.

· Hmmm… I’m telling you, when it comes to dressing up, girls’ here in DLA are not kidding. They think they are in NYC 4 real. The level is top-notch. You better look pretty, hip, and presentable in this city!

· It’s been about a month I didn’t sit in front of a TV set, to watch TV for more than 30 mins. But tonight, I watched TV with my cousins for more than 4 hours… watched all those Friday night shows on TF1 (The French Channel). We watched Koh-Lanta (The French “Fear Factor”); then the “Prime” of Secret Story (I’m already a fan on Johnathan, the dude with the IQ of Einstein <3>

· Yes, I’m a Nerd, and proud of it! Lol

· I love warm colors/ earth colors: Brown J!!! Orange, red, golden, and all the deep shades of each. Those are my colors. Plus WHITE, of course… I can imagine in my wedding gown… the perfect color for the perfect bride!!! ;-)

· Have you ever ridden(?) a motorbike, in the middle of the city, with the wind blowing in your face, on a very sunny day? Ahhhhhh… I just did, and it’s so great. I love it. Luv luv luv it. Made me wanna buy a motorbike. Ok, so the first 2-3 times, I was kinda apprehensive (yet excited) about the experience. I told my cousin I can’t ride the bike by myself, so we had to ride together. So the driver, me in the middle, and my cousin in the back. I felt more secure that way. But with 3 rides, I got more comfortable, and started trusting those usually reckless moto drivers, and finally I rode it by myself, at 11pm at night…. Hmmm… sometimes I myself wonder on my level of “adventurism” (thinking with retrospect of course). But you can’t live fully unless u get out of your comfort zone once in a while. And I’m happy I did. Still smiling thinking about that ride….

· I met up with one of my friends from my Boarding school days. It had been 8 years I hadn’t seen her, Pauline. She came over to my place in Douala, and we hung out all day long. Catching up, chatting, shopping. It seemed like we were always in touch all this time.

· I always try to preserve friendships, or at least a good relationship with people I’ve encountered in my life. I see beauty, value, potential in everyone, so it’s hard for me to give up on people. It’s hard for me to be self-sufficient and adopt the “I-can-do-without-him/her.” I definitely can. But humans shouldn’t be used as means, but as an end in itself. Immanuel Kant said that, not me. Yet, it could’ve been my very words. I think, most of us can do without someone, it’s possible. It’s possible to keep living your life, just fine, without a somebody, and as human beings we have a high capacity to adapt to new circumstances, we all have a bottom rock of resilience…. Still, even though we can do without someone, we shouldn’t neglect them. Because treating someone with any emotions less than respect and love would imply you are viewing the person as a “means” rather than an “end”, you like the person “because of” (their wealth, beauty, attitude, connection, popularity, proximity to you, support, etc) rather than “despite the fact that” (they are poor, ugly, powerless, selfish, unpopular, far away from you, dump) …

· I’ve disciplined myself since my teenagehood to never, intentionally, neglect people, give up on them, despise whomever, adopt a self-sufficient attitude (even though it’s possible), make people feel inferior. I actually think those who do that are kinda lost, clueless ... They still have to understand some realities of life. Perhaps they need to go to South Africa and learn the Ubuntu philosophy. That people are people through people. We are only humans through other people’s humanity. Thus, you can’t treat people in a manner less than human, yet claim you urself are human. · Personally, I love people. I do. I have a passion for people, and an interest in people that I can’t describe. Maybe it’s because I love God very deeply. And I don’t think you can truly say you love God, and not love humanity/people.

· Adaezeluvvvv…. My dearest mentee, my sister from another mother and father and country, gave me a call today. Specifically during the time SONEL (the equivalence of NEPA in Naija) cut the lights. Lol. It was so great though, to hear her voice on the other end of the phone, and to tchat and update each other. .. It’s a grace of God to have wonderful friends. I feel truly exceptionally wonderfully blessed with the fantastic friends I have. Love u all!!!

· Inner peace is my emotional barometer. I’ve nurtured myself into a peace-loving and peace-seeking individual. I don’t think I was born that way, cuz I remember being an 11-13yrs old who loved trouble – always fighting, always quarrelling, with hurtful words, expensive jokes –but I learned man… I realized it wasn’t cool to hurt people, and at the end of the day I felt horrible being terrible to others. So, I got sick and tired (of being sick and tired (Fannie Lou Hammer is whispering in my ears,lol) of acting the same way, and having guilty feelings afterwards. So I worked on myself. Trained myself to be a better person, more caring, more understanding, more loving. The result is only positive. At least, at the end of the day it’s better to feel at peace with yourself, than to be agitated and aggravated about the actions you/others committed. Today, inner peace is my emotional barometer. As soon as I drift away from my inner peace, I try to fix the situation.

· In the Documentary “What the Bleep do you know …”, they say our bodies and emotions can be explained with metaphysics, basically we get addicted to the emotions we are used to. When you get angry about a specific thing, it’s more likely for you to be angry all the time with that thing. So, if you are someone who quickly gets angry, you somehow become addicted to that emotion, and thus you are constantly mad. The key is to realize you are addicted to those feelings and breakout of the vicious cycle. The positive side of the story though, is that you also are addicted to positive feelings. So if you are always happy, positive, content, your body tries to preserve that state, and even when you drift away from it, the mechanisms in your body will try to bring you back to that positive state you are addicted to. Anyways, those who watched the short film know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s a very interesting concept.

· Man… Corneille is simply a Genius of music. I’m addicted to his English Album, “The Birth of Cornelius”… The words… the words… the Lyrics… so well thought-out, so deep, so real… His wife must be in heaven. From Song #1 to Song #9 every word is rightly chosen, every sentence is profound, and the melody is pleasantly soothing… I loooooooveeeeeeeeeeeee that Album!!!!
I luuuuuuuuv iiiiiittttt!!!

· You really are not judged by what you have, but by what you DO with what you have. At the end of the day it doesn’t even matter if you are smart, beautiful, handsome, rich, tall, mansion-owner, Ivy league graduate, Prince, King, what matters is what you do with those blessings you have been given. Are you simply content with it, or do you try to use that little advantage you have over the average person, for something grander than yourself?

· Abundantly blessed and Highly favored.